I want to be strong this time and not jump into a new relationship too quickly. Thinking of being single for a year, find myself, love myself and regain my strength. But as I get ready to step out to get brunch, I feel the desire to have company, someone to share my time with... to laugh with. I need that so much because I didn't have it during the last 12 years of my marriage. This is going to be harder than I thought!
Over 15 years ago, I frantically drove up and down the Berlin Turnpike looking for my husband. I entered every single motel on that strip, slowly driving through each parking lot checking for his car. I called his cell phone countless times leaving numerous voicemails begging him to please answer me. With smudged eyeliner all over my face, I could barely see through the tears as I sped up and down the strip in my car. And if that wasn't bad enough, I had left behind my six year old daughter sleeping home alone (thankfully she didn't wake up). Talk about poor desperate choices! A woman's brokenness is usually rooted from childhood experiences. Insecurities planted way back before they became young adults. Beliefs of being less than or not good enough subconsciously programmed into the mind. It's not noticeable right away but it changes their behavior. Later in life, she accepts constantly being rejected, disrespected and manipulated by their spouse. Just like the ocean
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